Sunday, September 17, 2017

Cutie goes on a date at the workplace

City lights | late night |- on a date night
cupcake plain in sight, _ should I take a bite?
Nibble on the nipple but please do it civil
Nibble on the nipple but please do it civil

Malory's allergy is a low salary
better pay for dinner, no , salad's not a valid tease
she likes fancy cheese, booty needs them calories
like she's running track on this track from the seventies!

Ahead of me, in a two piece this date
taught me how ta untie a shoelace
during an earthquake in the workplace
damn, HR just laid down that yellow tape

Oh oh oh oh

Monday, September 11, 2017

Cutie at Horse Shoe Bend

Horse Shoe bend not many men inhabitied (B)
Found Her in the bush ask what hat you in
Looked me in my eyes asked "whats happenin?"
Takin' you around the Bend then backin' in

Shirt's outback shortage of racks
Still hangin' my shirt on that
Asked me where I learned to rap
Told her right there were she sat

In tha bushes tushes,
with Brazillians, Brazillian waxes...
no bushes
No hoodies but I'll still hood-it
Dreams don't walk themselves
Gotta foot-it

This just in - I tease her
I'm as old as a beeper
She's in love with Justin, Justin Bieber
I'mma keep-her, but if I saw her id
would she be too young to be a keeper?

Wednesday, August 23, 2017

Six Bride's Maids

6 Brides Maids and the bride in the way
who say this day special any way

folded arms like Bitch you in my way
you said you needed to be in the picture anyway

14/15 seconds

Nameste doin yoga on those off days, brides maids layered like a parfait

15 seconds

some got grapes other got dates, all got bob to pay for the boob job mistake
fruit of the looms loomed at bob's wake poor little bob didn't waaa-a--ake

some fake n bake, others shake and bake, pink babe in the back brought a cake

butterflies cocooned, bride leader of the balloons.

Boss lady running a racketeer, cover up brides maids wearing rabbit ears... you can't see it but they got tatted rears

Tuesday, August 22, 2017

Two Face Cutie on a Two Day Duty

Two face cutie on a two day duty
Way she treated me, was truly unruly
Had me coming back like that cat Doug Flutie, I didn't want to tap that booty
insisted on sausage so I gave her Andouille. nibbled a bit on it I went kablooey

Lips of a cutie so mean - Judge Judy

my name's Amiin, she likes dark skin, I mean Salaam

How much more can you take of this song?

Wait wait wait what verse was I on, ok ok hold on

35/36 seconds

Put a fitbit on a chick this thick - she's already fit...
quick wit gets her naked this quick

Bra strap misses on a misses,
goin' topless to the top of the hit list
Billboard in the pants - I want to hit this

Monday, August 21, 2017

Canon on a Cameron Lookin' Through A Canon

Canon on a Cameron Lookin' Through A Canon
Lock a nudist in the bathroom no tannin

Take a picture lights camera no action'
boobs not in sight ----- no fa-pp-in'

No water no soap wrote a note to the Pope.
Asked for a little bit of 3rd world hope.

Vocals in a pentameter, nipples in a centimeter
Metrically speaking her feet never seen-her

One eye closed but not a tweaker,
parched lips, a dehydrated speaker.

Boomin' this beat given you an earful of speaker
vocals lost -n- found, and you the seeker

You don't know-tho, I rap to these photos
I'm big but yet unknown like Texas' Desoto

I rap they pose, some touch their toes,
pictures speak my flow, send a photo
I promise it'll be magical like Frodo Covered in Froyo!


Friday, June 23, 2017

Girls, Girls, GIrls


Standin' outside in the cold
with no soul, waiting to see
girls girls on the pole
pull-em waist high hoes, hoes, hoes, hoes
No Santa Claus but on the lap they go

Inside many clowns breakin many vowels
- while that wife at home foldin' many towels

Thinkin game is hot but really mild....

Sunday, June 18, 2017

Salem Witch Hunt in a Noose

Salem witch hunt, look at this one
on the run / from the sun
Pale doesn't chase just anyone
No sunscreen - so makeup won't run
Standin' there like she just won

Holdin' a stick in the photo
lookin' like a female Frodo
Internal desires - - - -
Feed me Froyo

Not not afraid... No Pollo

If I had to choose, I'm make a noose....

Random thoughts....

Monday, June 5, 2017

My CBS Scorpion Moment in Moab Utah

The day was May 26, 2017, the road was long, night even longer…   
6 hours on the road, Denver to Moab/ Toes loitering… starting to pick up a toe-tab/

TL:DR - Watch this 1 min 17 second video recap -

On that night, little did I know, the nearly 2 years of brain training with Elevate and Lumosity would come to the rescue...

Let’s start at the start, that’s where all stories start, right?  Ah, ok… perhaps not always, but it’s a good place to start ;).

Earlier in the week, I salivated over the thought of Memorial Day Weekend BBQ and little misses in pretty shoes, ok I made that last part up.  Memorial Day Weekend had always been a favorite pastime of mine.  I’d surround myself with great company, barbecued chickens and cattle, nature, water and adventure. So I thought, this weekend would be just as great as years’ past had been.

After my cloud nine thoughts of the upcoming weekend had been pressed like the 50 lb paperweight atop my mountain of papers at work, I felt those very same clouds had morphed into anvils.  Have you ever mentally bench pressed an anvil?  Takes a lot out of you, right!?

Meeting after meeting, call after call, project upon project, people wanted a problem solver.  Universities, city governments, police departments, had more than their fair share of requests.
I obliged with wide-eyes, and coffee cups brewed from mommy-wives.  *Sigh*, I just wanted an apron with paring knives. Ladies missing their napkins, dropping barbeque, making barbeque thighs, I let the napkin thief out of the bag… It had nine-lives.  
Sun dresses shine, neighborhood guys showin’ off their fine-wives.

Ok, so you already see how my imagination went wild amidst the weekly workload…  Back to focus, my focus needs to be Fixed Or Repaired Daily, that’s the only way I’m ever going to get extra mileage out of my Focus ;).

Fast forward to Friday, after the grueling mule’ing of tooling, I was lucky enough to acquire a Moab Utah pooling.  I took my best friend, and not a cute-thing, she was online, doing her shoe-thing.  My best friend, let’s call him Alex, Alex had gotten off of work at noon, stoked and ready to hit the road to Moab.  I had been in my cubicle, typing with injured cuticles, attempting to escape.  Our owner had declared office closure at 3:30pm, like the last day of school.  I was happy, it meant I could hang my hat that read, PM.  Not so fast, had to finish a few tasks and 3:30 turned into 4:30. Ok, Now I make a clean getaway, arrive home to hurry-pack, so much so, I didn’t have time to shave my fury-back.

Ok, now we head out on the road to Moab Utah to beautiful Moab Springs Ranch.  Typical road trip festivities ensued, jokes, freestyles, bro-therapy, business meeting on wheels, girlfriend rants and raves; you know typical guy stuff.

So after a long and hard fought road trip to our little condo in the Moab desert, we parked in the driveway and I pulled up the screenshotted email of the security code to the Supra lockbox…  109 it read, I rubbed coffee from my eyes and began to caress the lockbox, I had “chastity belt-unlocking” level of excitement, however, soon enough I would find out this chastity belt was broken (chastity belts didn’t seem very hygienic anyways, you ever read about them?) and I’d have to be smarter than the average knight to unlock it.

Supra lockboxes - if I had to describe them, I’d say they are small panel-like boxes with pencil tips coming out.  Now I’m an 80’s baby, but I’ve never handled a Supra lockbox.  So I watch a Youtube video on how the inner components work, quickly digest the information, go over to this site where they speak about Supra Lockbox flaws.  I think, hey, stupid 109 is not working so let’s try the code in reverse, 901 - open sesame, mission accomplished, I “go home with Paige” type of win!

That took 25mins, maybe not “Scorpion” level speed but technology and know-how made a long trip and arrival successful, as opposed to calling up customer service, which was closed, and leave a voicemail complaint, then sleeping in car and getting harassed by a pack of coyotes…

When you’ve come so long in your journey, don’t take no as an answer, figure it out, and be relentless… You’ve come too far to sleep outside.

Warm wishes from your friendly neighborhood writer, designer, rapper,


P.S. If CBS Scorpion is casting, let them know I’m available ;)